tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post538917612502419210..comments2024-03-16T14:19:24.563-06:00Comments on Narcissists Suck: Is the Laborer Worthy of His Wage?Anna Valerioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02537877317873251678noreply@blogger.comBlogger14125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-2363352217184282232008-04-10T11:43:00.000-06:002008-04-10T11:43:00.000-06:00P.S. As much as it pains me, I have strict limits...P.S. As much as it pains me, I have strict limits on my caffeine intake. I wish I could tipple the java all day long. Alas, I drink two cups in the morning. Period. On a rare occasion, I may have an afternoon cup. But it is rare. I value a good night's sleep...so any caffeine after 3:00 p.m. runs the real risk of disturbing my *cough* beauty sleep. I'm bein' good. Honest.Anna Valerioushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02537877317873251678noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-83113568526535455842008-04-10T11:34:00.000-06:002008-04-10T11:34:00.000-06:00I hope that it can be seen that my post was in no ...I hope that it can be seen that my post was in no way critical of the commenter. I made it clear that the comment "sparked my thinking". I dealt specifically with the <I>narcissist's</I> thinking and world view. I was not criticizing the commenter's perspective or choice of words. I was dealing with how N's may influence us to think on a specific topic. I then did specifically thank the commenter for her comment because I truly appreciated her expressing her opinion. Let's be fair. Neither myself, nor the other commenters, are picking on or being impatient with anyone. Please don't personalize what wasn't being made personal. I was dealing with a concept, not pushing down someone's right to express themselves.Anna Valerioushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02537877317873251678noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-71447604398714444552008-04-10T10:46:00.000-06:002008-04-10T10:46:00.000-06:00Can relate to KrL's response regarding "Labourer W...Can relate to KrL's response regarding "Labourer Worthy..." from Anna. All of us have been damaged and some of us are just beginning this healing process. We are extremely suspicious of others. We hope that we can trust, but it's a slower process for some than for others. I wasn't offended by Anna's kitty and coffee post. And, Anna, you are my "sister" in "narcissistic pain" and all of you sister or brother readers are too. <BR/><BR/>Patience with one another is the order of the day. My biggest fear is that I have subconsciously become like my mother and display narcissistic tendencies, keep asking my husband if I do, and so far it's a total negative. Am a lot like your reader Krl and I cannot always articulate what am feeling, nor put it in words sometimes. Was so accustomed to just stuff my responses down deep; with this site we finally feel the freedom to express without the critical eye of our beloved "looker". Have a nice day, and watch that caffeine intake!!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-87767148824199630522008-04-10T09:20:00.000-06:002008-04-10T09:20:00.000-06:00I understood you, Sister....I can't say this for y...I understood you, Sister....I can't say this for you....and I can barely find the articulation for myself....but I'll try.<BR/><BR/>You guys...Hey! Some of us are still trying to understand WHAT happened to us. WHY we react like we do. WHY our responses and reactions are like they are. Lots of days, I can't even get hold of my feelings, much less my thinking on any given subject. I don't have a handle on all the lingo and abbreviations and knowledge about this crap we called Life. I'm not whining....I'm not bitching....I'm not 'feeling sorry for myself'....I'm just plain peddlin' as fast as I can to 'catch up'. Some of 'catching up' is back-peddlin'....searching for personal context for what is being written. Many of you commenters are way ahead...very articulate...very knowledgeable....and VERY VALUABLE..to us in our healing. Many of us don't quite say what we mean...or ask what we mean..quite 'right'. We're struggling for articulation....(If we weren't even allowed to SAY things before...or question, why would we be great at it now?)<BR/><BR/>Personally? I don't give a rat's ass if you shoot me for not holding my mouth 'right'. Been there....all my life. But I KNOW WHAT I AM DRIVING AT. I WILL STUDY AND LEARN. I WILL LEARN TO ARTICULATE SOME DAY....and God sure as hell knows what I mean. That's why I'm not afraid to post comments....sure, I 'cringe' a little, thinking, "Oh Lordy, maybe I didn't read this thoroughly enough....maybe I didn't 'get it'..Maybe I'd better read it again." But, the reality is. This blog is my Lifeline (not discounting God)...my touch-base each and every day. No matter how 'stupid' I might feel or think. Do I LIKE some of the 'impatience' I read in the blog. Heck no. But I'm not here to have someone 'hold my hand'. I'm here to learn. My 'backwardness' isn't someone else's problem...but any validation of 'normal under the circumstances' sure doesn't hurt when I'm trying to get my equilibrium.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-34194476614506288172008-04-10T07:48:00.000-06:002008-04-10T07:48:00.000-06:00I'm glad you put up the widget and wrote the post....I'm glad you put up the widget and wrote the post. You can tell what a person values by how they spend two finite resources: time and money. There is a large time investment that goes into this blog that helps many people, me included. I'm glad you brought it to our attention so when I'm thinking of buying an item there, I can give back and show appreciation for your efforts.ryshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17152136745067431908noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-71450322968109809792008-04-10T07:32:00.000-06:002008-04-10T07:32:00.000-06:00Anna Again you put your finger right on it.. "The...Anna Again you put your finger right on it.. "The narcissist demands of us servitude. All labor for the narcissist is to be with out payment. Another word for that is slavery. So.. for years, usually decades, we labor, we sweat, we bleed for the narcissist..." Thankfully I'm beyond the shell-shock part of "recovery" from the N and therefore can exercise my choice to give, act, and be from a much more balanced, healthy sense of self. How liberating!! There is life beyond the narcissistic web!!<BR/>So, I raise my coffee mug to all in pursuit of true freedom!!jacquelinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06889418946102340775noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-42129827893279375112008-04-09T23:24:00.000-06:002008-04-09T23:24:00.000-06:00You have completely misunderstood my comment.Siste...You have completely misunderstood my comment.<BR/><BR/>SisterSisterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03035995104646049957noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-8406158826383410842008-04-09T18:09:00.000-06:002008-04-09T18:09:00.000-06:00Some quick thoughts on commerce and the idea of "s...Some quick thoughts on commerce and the idea of "safety" brought up in the last comments. Commerce and safety are not mutually exclusive. The idea of someone getting some financial compensation for information about abuse is completely neutral; it is not unsafe or wrong in any way in and of itself. Of course, there are many examples of people exploiting persons in need for unscrupulous gain. There are many "self help" websites that are thinly disguised informercials for expensive products or services. There are also legit self help websites that offer free information as well as simultaneously clearly also being for profit business offering services like professional counseling. And on popular blogs by individuals, revenue generating ads are common, as are options to donate towards operating expenses via paypal, and deals like this one with amazon and other retailers. [Hey, ever thought of a line of "N's sucks" tee shirts from Cafe Press?]<BR/><BR/>I am continually impressed and humbled by the fact that so many bloggers and website makers out there put massive amounts of free information on the web for the benefit of complete strangers, with no compensation save an option for voluntary donations or some ad revenue to help towards the expenses. Even when blogs take in some money, in terms of time spent for return, most blogs remain what they started as: a labor of love that we as readers should not take for granted. <BR/><BR/>Making money is not exploitation, being deceptive about money is exploitation. Deception about money is about hidden costs, bait and switch, taking unfair advantage of a need, or using manipulation or coercion, etc. She has been upfront, clear, and disclosing exactly how it works and exactly what she would get out of it, down to the percent passed on by amazon. Most blogs in fact just put up the amazon link and don't even bother to explain it. <BR/><BR/>Ok, that was my 2¢.... and I hope someone buys that TV too!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-14340689404456398292008-04-09T17:42:00.000-06:002008-04-09T17:42:00.000-06:00I'm concerned about the google ad on the left of t...I'm concerned about the google ad on the left of the main page called Cure for Narcissism. I find the web site to be troubling. Anyone know anything about this or have comments?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-349310585947312362008-04-09T16:28:00.000-06:002008-04-09T16:28:00.000-06:00Well....just so ya know..I wouldn't have batted an...Well....just so ya know..I wouldn't have batted an eye about continuing to read your blog....nor would I have hesitated to clickclick that dealie to order a book. I'm just thought I missed something and was scrambling and searching the last post to see if I didn't read something right. Thought I might be a little 'dense'....and it wouldn't be the first time!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-10196756584697568412008-04-09T15:39:00.000-06:002008-04-09T15:39:00.000-06:00Anna - as a firm believer in the beauty of capital...Anna - as a firm believer in the beauty of capitalism, I never once questioned your decision to place an Amazon widget on your blog. In fact, I've wondered more than once why you hadn't put up a "donate" button or at least a few AdSense ads.<BR/><BR/>What you're doing here is incredibly helpful, and I'm sure I'm not alone in believing you *absolutely deserve compensation for it. <BR/><BR/>As for the lightheartedness of the post, I fail to see why that's been at issue. Surely no one expects you to be serious all the time?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-42074347348123068772008-04-09T14:11:00.000-06:002008-04-09T14:11:00.000-06:00Hey, thanks, krl, for letting me know you too had ...Hey, thanks, krl, for letting me know you too had a mixed reaction and that my follow up post helped sort things out a bit. :o)Anna Valerioushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02537877317873251678noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-17265370873607799642008-04-09T13:20:00.000-06:002008-04-09T13:20:00.000-06:00You just kill me, Anna! Well said....all said.......You just kill me, Anna! Well said....all said....Daaaannnngg! All I remember when I read your 'silly' post was "Whhhhaaatttt?"...and never did get hold of what my mixed feelings about it were! Too right. I think I landed right in the middle...and figured you were being just that. Presenting a 'human' element....some levity...something 'other' since we are delving into some deep waters. I'm so glad you addressed this and followed up with this post. Right on the money. No pun intended. Well, maybe that wasn't a pun....but one of those other fancy words I can never remember. Doesn't matter. Thanks....Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-8158740768534730212008-04-09T12:23:00.000-06:002008-04-09T12:23:00.000-06:00I'll be the first to comment on my post. How weir...I'll be the first to comment on my post. How weird is that? <BR/><BR/>I want to thank the person who posted the comment on my last post this a.m. which I've responded to in this post. I really <I>do</I> appreciate knowing your reaction to my last post because it presented an opportunity to deal with yet another aspect of NPD, especially how having a MN parent can confuse our thinking on things. If you thought along the lines you expressed, then I assumed others might as well. So I really do enjoy the opportunity to deal this this thought process. I wasn't offended. Just stimulated to respond. Love ya, sista!Anna Valerioushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02537877317873251678noreply@blogger.com