tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post4762134852555223032..comments2024-03-16T14:19:24.563-06:00Comments on Narcissists Suck: They Hide From Truth Because Their Deeds are EvilAnna Valerioushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02537877317873251678noreply@blogger.comBlogger56125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-41875574895053982592016-02-13T13:05:59.281-07:002016-02-13T13:05:59.281-07:00You are right on the mark.
It's sad, that nar...You are right on the mark.<br /><br />It's sad, that narcs use religion to hide behind. The narc in my life is a well known "Christian" book writer and counselor. He treated his 1st wife as a servant and "gas lighted" his family and friends. Right now he is getting his though. His new wife is verbally and physically abusive to him. Cussing,spitting and hitting him. Justice will prevail!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13410383161763593282noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-81221227002036934312009-01-01T10:26:00.000-07:002009-01-01T10:26:00.000-07:00Please continue going to Church. That is to honor ...Please continue going to Church. That is to honor God.<BR/> <BR/>Even the devil can quote scripture to suit his own needs. I'm sure the priest/reverend is referring to a NORMAL person who is truly sorry, who needs forgiveness. <BR/>A MN (Malignant Narcissist)isn't sorry, so how can they expect forgiveness? They did nothing wrong? <BR/><BR/>Also, we need to realize that some people haven't experienced what most of you have. (My MN was a sweetheart compared to a lot of yours)Unless a person has a long-term relationship (parents, spouse, children, or other close family member)with a MN, they truly cannot understand what it involves.<BR/><BR/>DO NOT let them get you in a conversation with them, using God, to allow them to torture you and yours.<BR/><BR/>Ask them one question out of the blue...blindside them (when they are a good mood)"Would you want to be around someone who hurts you?"<BR/>Then say,"HA,that's why I'm cutting you out of my life."<BR/>No more needs to be said or explained...get the hell out of there or hang up on them.<BR/><BR/>I wonder, since WE are all so bad according to our MN, why do they want to be around us?<BR/><BR/>Someone needs to ask one of their MNs and let us know!!!<BR/><BR/>God bless and hang in there and leave the MN trash out of your life.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-63750370248977540602008-11-20T10:16:00.000-07:002008-11-20T10:16:00.000-07:00When the N calls my cell phone, it comes up as "Th...When the N calls my cell phone, it comes up as "The Narcissist", which gives me a knee-jerk reaction to be "ON GUARD".Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-53966827122538238912008-11-19T13:28:00.000-07:002008-11-19T13:28:00.000-07:00Marie,Your advice to Tim: Don't JADE (justify, arg...Marie,<BR/>Your advice to Tim:<BR/> Don't JADE (justify, argue, defend, explain)<BR/>is fantastic! I will be using this when I see my toxic sister in a week.<BR/>Thank you.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-40541947206737712132008-11-19T13:22:00.000-07:002008-11-19T13:22:00.000-07:00I was reluctantly listening to a sermon today abou...I was reluctantly listening to a sermon today about honoring your mother and father. I say reluctantly because I had a feeling to were he was going with this. It gets me so angry that a pastor thinks that if "you would just show love" to these type of people, then they can see how you as a person has changed then they will see Jesus in you(usually it`s something that they`ve delt with in their own families). My n parents and family eat this up and think that I`m not honoring them. How is it honoring to that person to allow them to treat you with evil intent, time and time again. This is one of the reasons that I don`t go to church right now. Then you get looked down upon because of the choice of nc. I`m sick of that crap!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-23914955687434915042008-11-19T11:58:00.000-07:002008-11-19T11:58:00.000-07:00Tim,Simple easy to remember advice when speaking t...Tim,<BR/><BR/>Simple easy to remember advice when speaking to an N or any other controlling person: Don't JADE (justify, argue, defend, explain). Best of luck to you and your daughter. <BR/><BR/>MarieAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-81369986514555730092008-11-18T20:41:00.000-07:002008-11-18T20:41:00.000-07:00Hello, All.I've been reading all of your comments....Hello, All.<BR/><BR/>I've been reading all of your comments....and I feel utterly ill thinking of those of you who still have....or have to have contact with your Ns. Ugh. I couldn't do it.<BR/><BR/>Many of Anna's previous posts have to do with this very thing. The 'how to-s'....if you HAVE to have any contact. No words of mine could possible serve as any 'encouragement'. Going NC is a painful process sometimes......at least getting to the point that you KNOW in your deepest being that NOTHING will change them....that you can NOT 'work with the situation'. I fear it WILL BE arduous and frazzle-ing. If you have children involved....and have to have contact with the Nparent...there simply isn't much choice in the matter and you'll learn to 'streamline' the process as best as you can. Keep reading ANYTHING and EVERYTHING that will arm you with what you need to know and need to be...(or NOT be). <BR/><BR/>Try to keep in mind that you are NOT dealing with a normal 'difficult' personality. This isn't about personality. This is about EVIL. Once you grasp the nature of this 'entity', many of your choices and decisions will be more 'natural'. If you opened the door, and a monster was standing there....you would slam it quick. If a pervert called you on the phone, you would hang up. If your child was being molested, you would snatch them out of reach. If your neighbor was harrassing you....talking shit about you....calling you names....stealing from you....you would NEVER talk to them again, possibly get a restraining order etc. What seems like the 'natural' thing to do in these scenarios, applies equally to the kind of contact we have had with either parents, or siblings, or other family members. Just because it is 'family', does not give them sanction from our horror or disgust or anger or to take action against. THEY RELY ON YOU ALLOWING THEM TO HIDE INSIDE THE FAMILY. Once I no longer considered them 'family', they can't pull that shit on me anymore. I don't speak to or entertain evil assholes. I don't send them BD cards. I don't buy them holiday gifts. I don't OWE them ANYTHING. Period. And I don't WANT anything from them either. (Gifts from Ns were always ChocolateCoveredTurds anyway.)<BR/><BR/>Go back.....read and re-read Anna's previous blogs....There's miles and miles of good stuff from Anna and in the comments. Keep reading and relating to them. It takes some time.....but it is so well worth it.<BR/><BR/>Again, to all of you who CANNOT go NC because of children....my whole heart goes out to you. This sounds like one of the toughest things to possibly have to endure...and to suffer because of the kids. Pray for your children's protection....and pray for wisdom each day....with each encounter you have to have. I like to think that God gives Special Grace and Protection in these instances. I don't know.<BR/><BR/>Ok...keep on keeping on. krlAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-17711201765069527312008-11-18T20:39:00.000-07:002008-11-18T20:39:00.000-07:00Dear Tim:On the phone deal @ work I would simply k...Dear Tim:<BR/>On the phone deal @ work I would simply keep repeating, "hello?", "hello?", and when she starts talking continue to make like there is no one on the other end. if it's a case where a switchboard takes the call and forwards it directly to your line she may call them after several tries and ask what is wrong with your line. just simply tell the switchboard if they call you "nothing is wrong with my line." you won't be lying, but when they try to put her through to you, simply repeat the same procedure. this will drive her nuts when she contacts the front again. after the switchboard is contacted and they know there is nothing wrong with your phone, if you have a hold button just put her on hold. if no hold button, then simply lay your phone down and voila! instant relief. if there is no switchboard then you've got it even better because you can drive her crazy the first 2-3 times she calls with the hello, hello thing. then proceed to the phone hold or lay down method. if you feel you must talk at all, just say, "uh huh" "mmm hmmm" , at crazy times that make no sense and watch what it'll do. then when she gets irate just say, "oh, were you saying something? I missed that." then repeat the above steps until she hangs up on you. Sorry this is so long but I just feel a mean streak tonight! Seriously, try these steps or develop your own. There is a way to work it. Study her to see what works. You'll find a chink in her armour somewhere.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-90456430663123538892008-11-18T19:07:00.000-07:002008-11-18T19:07:00.000-07:00THANKS ONCE AGAIN FOR EVERYBODYS ADVICE, I REALLY ...THANKS ONCE AGAIN FOR EVERYBODYS ADVICE, I REALLY APPRECIATE IT. BASED ON THE OVERWHELMING ADVICE ON NOT TO WRITE A LETTER OF EXPLANATION, I WON'T. ON THE ADVICE OF WRITING A LETTER TO MYSELF,I WILL START TO DOCUMENT SOME OF THE OUTRAGEOUS BRHAVIOR OF MY NMOM. ALSO MY SEVEN YEAR OLD DAUGHTER WROTE ME ON A PIECE OF PAPER THAT HER NGRANDMA TOLD HER TO TITLE A BOOK "NIGHTMARE ON THE ROAD WITH THE -----(WIFE'S MAIDEN LAST NAME).I NOW AFTER READING ABOUT NPEOPLE IS THAT THEY USE DIVIDE AND CONQUER SCHEMES TO GET THEIR WAY AND THATS EXACTLY WHAT MY NMOM HAS BEEN TRYING TO DO WITH MY DAUGHTER. FORTUNAELTY FOR ME MY DAUGHTER WOULD EVENTUALLY REPEAT TO ME ALL OF NGRANDMAS HATRED TOWARDS MY WIFE AND MY WIFE'S PARENTS INCLUDING MYSELF A COUPLE TIMES. I ALSO HAVE ANOTHER PAPER WHERE MY DAUGHTER WROTE THAT NGRANDA ALWAYS BLAMES HER FOR TELLING DADDY EVERYTHING THAT NGRADMA SAYS.<BR/><BR/>I ALSO HAVE COME TO THE REALIZATION THAT AT TIMES IN MY LIFE I HAVE HAD SOME CHARACTERISTICS OF NPEOPLE. I AM GOING TO SEE A THERAPIST TO HELP ME UNDERSTAND AND CHANGE SOME OF MY BEHAVIOR THAT I HAVE DONE IN MY LIFE AND THAT I BELIEVE HAS BEEN PASSED ON TO ME BY MY NMOM. I NEED ALOT OF HEALING AND I HOPE MY THERAPIST CAN HELP ME UNWIND THE BS THAT I HAVE AQUIRED. <BR/><BR/>I HAVE CHANGED MY HOME PHONE # AND ADVISED MY DAUGHTER TO NO LONGER CALL NGRANDMA. I AM ALSO SCREENING MY CELL PHONE CALLS, BUT I AM JUST WAITING FOR THE TSUNAMI TO COME IN WHEN MY NMOM CALLS ME AT WORK. I AM ALREADY PREPARING WHAT I WILL SAY TO HER, WHICH IS THAT I MADE IT VERY CLEAR LAST TIME THAT IF I KEPT HEARING YOUR NEGATIVE THOUGHTS THRU MY DAUGHTERS MOUTH THAT I WOULD NO LONGER BE APART OF YOUR LIFE.<BR/><BR/>ANY ADVICE ON WHAT YOU WOULD SAY WHEN THAT PHONE CALL COMES IN?<BR/><BR/>I DO NOT HAVE ANY WAY TO SCREEN MY WORK PHONE CALLS.<BR/><BR/>AGAIN THANK YOU FOR YOUR ADVICE, THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-51246164724626490102008-11-18T17:58:00.000-07:002008-11-18T17:58:00.000-07:00I've been reading here for a few weeks, and today ...I've been reading here for a few weeks, and today I began reading your posts about "Narcissist Appeasers", and what you wrote about your father. I believe that our son is an appeaser to his N wife, and their three daughters are the direct victims of this appeasement. Our son has also lost much contact with his extended family through the years, although there is now an arms-length relationship (on his terms only). I've often wondered how a confident, handsome, talented, Christian young man could fall in love with a woman who hates us so much. We've come to think of even her facial expressions as evil. What so many have written here has happened to us, and we had no way of understanding what in the world was going on. How could it be all our fault? It didn't make sense for many years.<BR/><BR/>I do worry about our granddaughters. We are wondering what to do about Christmas. Should we drive several hours to try and see them, or should we just stay home and mail their gifts to them. How much should we spend. We've often been in their area at Christmas to visit our other daughter but our son and his family have not been "available" even for a few hours. We never hear from them with a thank you after Christmas. <BR/><BR/>Our daughter-in-law is extremely verbally abusive and has been ever since we met her, although we are 'no contact' for several years now. It's much easier for all involved. He visits us with his daughters occasionally. But Christmas is coming up, and I'm wondering if we should try and spend some time with the granddaughters, or not. Should we feel guilty if we keep things low-key, not overspend, stay home and just send our love and gifts via mail? Or should we try harder to be a part of their holiday.. <BR/><BR/>From your perspective, Anna..what would you have wanted your grandparents to do...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-32491372594661473942008-11-18T16:49:00.000-07:002008-11-18T16:49:00.000-07:00Tim,I'm so glad you found this blog and the inform...Tim,<BR/><BR/>I'm so glad you found this blog and the information that you need to resurrect the N from your life. <BR/><BR/>Thank God none of us are alone anymore! Please google "Characteristics of a Narcissistic Mother". You will find, not only are we not alone, but we all had the same Momster!! I guess that makes us all relatives. Alas, the family I always wanted.<BR/><BR/>I'm 43 and it's going on 18 years this Christmas with no contact and no sight of my Malignant N Mother. I never EVER regretted my decision to go no contact but did sometimes doubt it. Having learned all about Malignant Narcissism there is absolutely no doubt in my mind that I made the most positive, life affirming move, I could possibly ever do for myself.<BR/><BR/>Knowledge is power. We've lived it, we've named it "Malignant Narcissism", we survived it, and we're moving beyond it! Out of the darkness and in to the light!<BR/><BR/>There are better days and better ways ahead! <BR/><BR/>Air punch and a whahoo!!! To all you brave souls who see the narc for what it is and say no more!! It's as if another Angel gets its wings and the Devil gets de-clawed!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-22791666854288796372008-11-18T14:55:00.000-07:002008-11-18T14:55:00.000-07:00Anna!! As always, a great post!! Hope you are "i...Anna!!<BR/><BR/> As always, a great post!!<BR/><BR/> Hope you are "into it" soon enough to help us create a "gameplan" for dealing with those "holiday visits" with Nparents in the coming weeks ahead!!<BR/><BR/> Thanks!! #281#453https://www.blogger.com/profile/08612659438325372072noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-11622203490053052802008-11-18T14:11:00.000-07:002008-11-18T14:11:00.000-07:00OMG,they love it when you feel the need to explain...OMG,they love it when you feel the need to explain to them. It means you care. <BR/><BR/> My N mother thought she was God and all explanations were to be brought before the throne.<BR/><BR/> <BR/>My old motto was, please believe me, I'm telling the truth. <BR/>My new and improved motto is, "It isn't up for discussion". <BR/><BR/>SHE HATES MY NEW MOTTO, lol. <BR/>Especially since shortly after I declared my new motto, things went South real quick, leading to NC.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-13308110123663450902008-11-18T11:07:00.000-07:002008-11-18T11:07:00.000-07:00Hi Tim:I just want to say I too agree with skippin...Hi Tim:<BR/><BR/>I just want to say I too agree with skipping the letter. I personally wasted so much of my life trying to explain things to N's. Nothing ever got through, and if often just gave them what they wanted: more contact and conflict, at the expense of my time and energy. My motto now is to "let them do the math" and let them wonder why I [and no doubt others before and after me] are gone from their life.<BR/><BR/>Good luck with everything. You sound like you are making the right choices for your daughter.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-88176495848621089072008-11-18T09:38:00.000-07:002008-11-18T09:38:00.000-07:00First off, thank you so much to those who reponded...First off, thank you so much to those who reponded to my post earlier this week. Your words of encouragement mean the world to me and now I don't feel so alone. That's really one of the heardest parts of identifing an N in your life isn't it? <BR/>Thanks again!<BR/><BR/>And to Tim:<BR/><BR/>I think it is a great thing to protect your daughter from her. In my situation, going NC, I did not write a letter. Many times an N will use that to try and prove that YOU are the crazy one or they are the victim. They are very skilled at turning anything their way. Just please be aware of that. I shutter to think how my NM will be allowed to emotionally rip apart my niece & newphew because my family doesn't see what I see.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-4824558374292276382008-11-18T09:29:00.000-07:002008-11-18T09:29:00.000-07:00To Tim: THe only letter you should write is a lett...To Tim: THe only letter you should write is a letter to yourself. I wish I had written more when things were really bad...so I could be sure my memory was correct. For most "normal" people, going nc is NOT EASY. I found (after 10 months) that, in some ways, it is a bit harder now. Memories fade, and I do question my decision (but that's when I go on-line and read Anna's blog and say to myself: "Oh yeah, now you remember why...") See, I think it is so hard for me to accept that my mom is as bad as she is. I am there now.<BR/><BR/> You sound like a very sensisitve person. I would recommend documenting the abuse so you never are deluded into thinking that things will change...because they won't. Do yourself the favor of providing evidence to yourself.<BR/><BR/>Good luck. Check back here often...it help me sooo much.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-58456749917994337672008-11-18T07:04:00.000-07:002008-11-18T07:04:00.000-07:00"...the happiness and success of others galls you ..."...the happiness and success of others galls you and makes you set about destroying it..."<BR/><BR/>Never in a million years did I ever think that a human being could be capable of doing this. Especially someone that I considered to be a good friend, it's mind blowing really. Kathy was a gifted writer.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-4658339075072722062008-11-18T04:35:00.000-07:002008-11-18T04:35:00.000-07:00I've been running around the internet, hungry for ...I've been running around the internet, hungry for anything I can read about Ns. (That Sam guy seems a bit nasty). I'm stunned at how "textbook" my father-in-law is! Wish I knew then what I know now -- I would have exposed his nastiness instead of being the "bigger person" and biting my tongue.<BR/><BR/>What hurts, of course, is the smear campaign after the cut off. But what hurts more is now KNOWING that he DELIBERATELY withheld from me what I wanted most, and DELIBERATELY did things I did NOT want him to do -- most of it as my husband was dying. It's the KNOWING CALCULATED PAIN they inflict that disturbs me the most.<BR/><BR/>Tim, your Nmom says your daughter is repeating the NEGATIVE things first -- tsk tsk on your daughter! She's ADMITTING she says negative things!! To a child! About the child's parent!<BR/>If that's not abusive, I don't know what is! And now it's the CHILD'S FAULT for not saying "postiive" things before the negative??? HUH????<BR/><BR/>Anna is right - keep your innocent child away from that woman. My children are a bit older than yours, and they are glad that I protected them from any more hurt. We always knew that Grandpa and Grandma A. were "different," and it was no fun to be around them.<BR/><BR/>Childhood is supposed to be fun.<BR/><BR/>I am SO GRATEFUL for this blog, Anna.<BR/><BR/>- KathleenAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-14023729367207975892008-11-17T22:46:00.000-07:002008-11-17T22:46:00.000-07:00Tim,Your daughter's tears of relief at your tellin...Tim,<BR/><BR/>Your daughter's tears of relief at your telling her she wouldn't have to see her grandma again speaks volumes. Don't ever break that promise! <BR/><BR/>As to a letter...I think it would likely be a waste of time and would only allow her to feel like she can argue with your reasons. Walk away. Don't look back.<BR/><BR/>And my very heartfelt congratulations at gaining freedom for yourself and your dear daughter.Anna Valerioushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02537877317873251678noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-61520862760397595352008-11-17T19:48:00.000-07:002008-11-17T19:48:00.000-07:00HI EVERYBODY,THANKS FOR THE KIND WORDS AND YOUR PR...HI EVERYBODY,THANKS FOR THE KIND WORDS AND YOUR PRAYERS. I AM SEEKING ADVICE. WHEN I WENT NC ABOUT A WEEK AGO,I DID NOT GIVE AN EXPALNATION TO NMOM,THATS BECAUSE IN THE PAST EVERYTIME I CONFRONT HER SHE DENIES IT AND SAYS MY 7 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER IS TELLING HER THE NEGATIVE FIRST.I AM SO EXHAUSTED WITH THIS SITUATION. THE FINAL NAIL IN THE COFFIN IS WHEN MY DAUGHTER TOLD ME THAT NGRANDMA BLAMES HER FOR CAUSING PROBLEMS BY TELLING HER DADDY EVERTHING THAT NGRANDMA SAYS.MY DAUGHTER THEN STARTED CRYING IN MY ARMS AND SIGHED IN RELIEF I BELIEVE WHEN I TOLD HER THAT WE WERE NOT GOING TO SEE NGRANDMA AGAIN. MY QUESTION IS SHOULD I EVEN WASTE MY TIME WRITING NMOM A LETTER EXPLAINING MY DECISION?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-28463552960392482442008-11-17T17:20:00.000-07:002008-11-17T17:20:00.000-07:00Tim I'm praying for you and your precious daughte...Tim I'm praying for you and your precious daughter. Be well.<BR/>You and your daughter are in my thoughts and prayers. luv JackieAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-26426791842968205972008-11-17T14:56:00.000-07:002008-11-17T14:56:00.000-07:00Tim,It's good to hear that you are finding your vo...Tim,<BR/><BR/>It's good to hear that you are finding your voice. It sounds like you have much to deal with but you know where you want to go. In my case, the road to recovering from the devastation of an N was made much easier by talking to a counselor who understood and helped me to choose a path of action. Maybe it would help you, too, to do the best you can to help your daughter.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-82734125068224226882008-11-17T13:06:00.000-07:002008-11-17T13:06:00.000-07:00grafxgrl98:I agree with Anon 10:41. Good points.A...grafxgrl98:<BR/><BR/>I agree with Anon 10:41. Good points.<BR/><BR/>Also. I thought I'd share my experiences surviving a slander campaign from an exN in a small town, in case it could be helpful. At the time I just tried to forget it as much as I could [I know, nearly impossible!], hold my head up high, and concentrate on my own life and cultivating and focusing on connections with others outside the sphere of slander. I joined groups/clubs, reconnected with old friends, made new ones, worked to take my job to a new level, and read and listened to things that were inspiring to me and strengthening to my inner resources. This was very lonely and difficult at times, and it took some years to build up new groups of connections, but also took my life to many new places which has been extremely rewarding in the long run. <BR/><BR/>In my case the exN ultimately was hung by his own rope. While he was able to very successfully convince people initially with his button-pushing and highly emotive claims, he lost credibility over the years simply due to his own behavior and choices in general life circumstances, which ultimately undermined other people's confidence in him. By then, when people looked at my life, they someone positive and saw that I had many people in my life who respected me. <BR/><BR/>I know family situations are different [from personal experience] because they involve different ties then social ones, but in all slander cases the N's are experts at finding out what type of information will get a rise out of the people they are baiting, so they can seem very successfully at first. Only time will tell how things play out though. For the ones that end up believing the N's version, even over time, it may well be time to let those people go, as hard and as totally unfair to you as that is. What can you do? A truly worthwhile and fair person - even if initially hoodwinked by cleverly timed and placed slander - should come around in time. And the ones who don't? They have made a choice too, even if by default.<BR/><BR/>I think some people ultimately 'side' with the N not because they have thought about anything carefully, but because they too are in denial of N's evil, and in order to side with you [even though the real facts are on your side] they would have to face and process something about the world that they just don't want to face: namely that some people are truly evil and destructive towards the very closest people in their lives.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-87374713550135056622008-11-17T10:41:00.000-07:002008-11-17T10:41:00.000-07:00Hi grafxgrl98:This is precisely why I visit this b...Hi grafxgrl98:<BR/>This is precisely why I visit this board. It helps me keep perspective. It also keeps me from having to talk about it with my loved ones so much that they dread hearing me come into the room. For me, I've come to the realization that really, most people don't care about things that don't affect them. Yes, they will listen, but really, when it's all said and done they go back to their business with those things that affect them and their lives. Just human nature. That's where sites like this are good. You can read all the content that Ana provides, then read the posters comments and glean something that helps in your particular situation. Keyboards don't tune out or say shut up already! The hardest thing to do is stay quiet when the slander starts. Pray, ask God to give you wisdom and then go about your normal business and let the day take care of itself. A tall order, but I'm saying this from experience. Easy? No. Wiser? I like to think so. Don't ever feel you are alone. This site was started for the very reasons that you've stated in your post. Hoping this helps you. Keep moving forward. Even if you have to drag and shuffle a bit.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32237145.post-47603108854880902542008-11-17T06:22:00.000-07:002008-11-17T06:22:00.000-07:00Hey guys- I am needing a little encouragment and t...Hey guys- I am needing a little encouragment and this seems to be the only place I can find it. Here is my situation- recently went NC w/ NM and her minion Dad. Now NM has launched a slander campagin agianst me (expected & nothing new) but the people buying into it should know me better. My in laws, who do not know my N parents very well but DO know me (to be level-head and normal) and my brother (and his family). I knew it was coming but everyone all at once is getting to me a bit. Even my husband just spews whatever his parents think because he cannot think for himself. He is there for me when I'm upset but its not very sincere. Which hurts even more. Anyone else have experience with this? Only one I have on my side is God but I still feel alone. I know I will be fine but it's still frusterating. <BR/><BR/>Thanks for listening guys!!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com